Joseph Reed Hayes, playwright

Slow Ride

Three generations of women take a Sunday ride, with all the tension, humor, affection and near-demented discord that arises when family is in close proximity for more than ten minutes. The eccentric, hold-out-hippie grandmother, her conventional daughter, and the Goth granddaughter who is fed up with both of them exhibit tension, humor, affection and near-demented discord.

SUE:  Last week, she threw out my silverware. Said aliens were using the forks to control our minds.
RITA: Aliens. Jezebel! Aliens? JEZ: Call me old-fashioned, but I'm simply not interested in having some ET rummaging around my brain with flatware. When a marauding mob of Martians marches down Main Street, I for one will not be standing around with a serrated pie server shoved up my –
SUE: Mother, do you mind? I'm trying to have a conversation with my daughter. You see? She’s totally paranoid. She thinks people are talking about her behind her back.
JEZ: What are you two talking about?
SUE and RITA: Nothing.

Comedy. One Act, 30 minutes. Three actresses. Can be done with minimal set.



Reading w/ music by Christopher Watkins, benefit for Kerouac House, Orlando FL 2006
Joyce Robison Geier
Paula Rossman
Alyssa Jade
Joseph Hayes, director

West Farms

A worn man reminisces about an almost mythical drinking establishment from his childhood near the West Farms bus depot in the Bronx. A gritty and worn-down place, the neighborhood had little to offer the adults who lived there, and even less to a child. But children, especially those who grow up in the Bronx, are resilient, and survive harsh times through humor and a tough skin.

"My favorite piece was Joseph Reed Hayes' gentle West Farms (directed by Ashland Thomas.) Willy (Eric Kurizky) grew up poor and neglected, and transferred his affections to his older brother Danny (John Hill). Danny aimed for fame in the ring, but wasn't good enough, and after a round of cheap booze ended up flying through the imaginary window of a strip club. The story is well wrought, and Kurizsky's presentation warms with support from the hard punching Danny and the creepy trainer Rickets (Derek Ormond.) Dreams fade, but we all find a time and place to live, even if we change busses occasionally." — Ink19.com

"Launch 2006"
Playwrights' Roundtable
Eric Kuritzky
John Hill
Derek Ormond
Ashland Thomas, director

"Summer Shorts X"
Playwrights' Roundtable
Eric Kuritzky
David Lugo
Charles R. Dent, director

Drama. One Act, 20-30 minutes. Three male actors. Can be done with minimal set.

watch the video
 
Telly Award Winner 2008
OrangeTV production and broadcast, Orlando FL 2007
Valencia College Black Box Theatre, Orlando FL 2007
Finalist, "Notes From the Underground" one-act festival, NYC 2006
Theatre Downtown, Orlando FL 2006
The Jazz Gallery, NYC 2003
Atlantic Center for the Arts 2000

Tell It To The Bird

Checking into a swank hotel, Mr. Thompson finds more than your typical amenities, including individual climate control, on-site fitness center, Internet access ... and Ethel, the Pest Elimination Companion..

Comedy. One Act, 10 minutes. Three actors. Can be done with minimal set, and feathers.


The Beast Festival Triangle Theatre NYC 2004
Doug Barron
Dana Bate
Kaci Gober
Nancy Rogers, director 

A God in Aspect

Jeremy Gilbert, minor government functionary at the Department of the Interior, meets the embodiment of his darkest dreams when a Lovecraftian Elder God walks into his office and demands to be classified an Endangered Species. Who is the more frightening?

Comedy. One act, 20 minutes. Three actors. Can be done with minimal set.

"Gods, Rabbits & Automobiles"
The Charade Drama Group Bristol, UK 2004
Nic Coward
Laetitia Hannan
Kevin Restall
Sian Taylor
Sian Taylor & Laetitia Hannan, directors 

Johnny Mystery: Public School Private Eye

The ghost in the closet, the Tooth Fairy, even the bite of the bed bugs, these are real things for Johnny Mystery, public school private eye ... and for his friends, he'll solve anything.  

Johnny is a bright ten-year-old, who solves mysteries only a kid can understand. His “office” is the monkey bars at the school playground, his best friend is Bradbury, the boy who would rather take interpretive dance and fencing lessons than play basketball, and his favorite pastime is memorizing lines from old detective movies.

When pretty and popular Cartier Smith comes to the monkey bars asking for help, Johnny’s first thought is “Of all the playgrounds in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”

Unfortunately, he says these lines out loud, confusing almost everyone, including his parents.

Comedy/Juvenile. series of 15-25 minute plays. Two male actors, one female, plus guests. Can be done with minimal set.

The Johnny Mystery Mysteries:

The Teddy Bear's No Picnic
Nothing But the Tooth
It's Even Worse than Gym

Written as half-hour radio plays, the JOHNNY MYSTERY MYSTERIES can be produced as children's theater in their original, live radio format or fully staged.